Page 2 - MidWeek Kauai - July 14, 2021

2 KAUA‘I MIDWEEK JULY 14, 2021
Rotten
Fast Cars And False Cracks
BY CHRIS MCKINNEY
PAPAYAS
L ike many now, I work completely from home. Last week, I was feeling restless, so I de- cided to go on a little adven- ture. I jumped in my car and went to see a movie at Regal Kapolei Commons. The late morning traffic was light, so I arrived early. Inside, I grabbed a Nathan’s Famous hot dog, popcorn and diet soda and entered the theater. I sat and reclined the seat. It was wonderful. It felt like I was flying first class to plac- es unknown. I was about to watch F9. Yes, the latest from the Fast & Furious franchise. Before you judge, let me say this: Mine was a child- hood filled with toy cars of every sort and T-shirts by Karin cars. I loved cars for as long as I can remember. And a Fast & Furious film never fails in showcasing mobile art. This latest installment outdoes itself. Big cars, small cars, cars of all types, rolled and flung around like buckets of Hot Wheels in the hands of
the familiar thematic heart- strings of family and forgive- ness. However, I will say that Charlize Theron and Helen Mirren appear in the mov- ie, and it looks like they’ re having fun. Both Vin Diesel and John Cena look properly weathered. I was happy to see Sung Kang rejoin the cast.
I judge a movie theater and chop suey dining experience the same. The sicker I feel when I walk out, the more satisfying experience I had be- cause I couldn’t help but over- do it. My stepdad used to say (just one of the many inappro- priate things he taught me) that if you’re going to false crack someone, catch them coming out of a chop suey joint.
And in one particular scene, Nathalie Emman- uel truly shines. She’s at the wheel during one of the many, many car chases. The only problem is she’s a Lon- doner who has never learned how to drive. This scene, and the film overall, is the closest thing to live action Looney Tunes that I’ve ever seen.
Well, F9 falsed me. I don’t think I left a theater feeling any sicker. It was a fantastic place to duck out of the sum- mer heat and indulge in a visu- al and cheat day extravaganza. I highly, highly recommend it.
(From left) Ludacris, Anna Sawai and Vin Diesel star in F9, the latest installment of the Fast & Furious franchise. PHOTO BY JORDAN STRAUSS/INVISION/AP
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a joyful toddler. You want a car in space? You get a car in space. F9 makes a John Wick film look like a documentary. It’s an absurd, visual specta- cle restomodded and super- charged to be viewed in a the- ater. Streaming this at home would be like hitting the track in a Prius instead of a Hellcat.
movie a stellar review. There probably isn’t a fan alive who cares. I’ ll admit that I loved it. Part of the reason why is because I recognize that it de- liberately breaks the laws of physics. In fact, it’s all remi- niscent of the bygone age of the Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote. Even one of the char- acters, Roman Pearce (played by Tyrese Gibson), continu-
ously points out the impossi- bility of it all throughout the story. That’s what Godzil- la vs. Kong lacked, among other things. A confession of self-awareness. I got so caught up in the excess that halfway through I went back to the concession and grabbed a pepperoni pizza.
There probably isn’t a film critic alive who has given this
I won’t bog you down with a story synopsis. F9 plucks at
Fill in the blank cells using numbers 1 to 9. Each number can appear only once in each row, column, and 3x3 block. Use logic and process of elimination to solve the puzzle. The difficulty level ranges from Bronze (easiest) to Silver to Gold (hardest). Answers are on page 11
RATING: GOLD