Page 2 - MidWeek Kauai - Nov 2, 2022
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 2 KAUA‘I MIDWEEK NOVEMBER 2, 2022
     Driving Without Destination
“Those we love don’t go away, they sit beside us every day.”
        HBear, Here
Iwent for a ride today. I have always been com- fortable staying at home, but today, over a month into the pandemic, I felt the need to get out of my house and drive, to breathe the tradewinds flowing through my car windows, to drive without destination.
was eerie. Back on the open road, my mother, still smil- ing, watched Hawai‘i stream past her window, so differ- ent from California where she lived, so different from Wisconsin where she grew up. Her face glowed from the wind and her elbow was peeking out the window, like when she drove with my dad.
ack in June, I attended an outdoor wedding. It was great to be around other humans and feel relatively safe for the first time in years. Event hosts painstaking-
the difference.
When I turned off the key
ly placed people (as always) at appropriate tables to maximize conversation and revelry. But just as we began scarfing down the post-nuptial meal, the wedding DJ inexplicably cranked up the music like he was emceeing a Euro-rage event where everyone’s buzzed. Buzzkill!
and looked back, she was gone.
Conversations came to a screeching halt, as did event en- joyment. Talking Heads once sang, “This ain’t no party, this ain’t no disco,” but this was a party, cut short by mistimed, throbbing, pulsating beats.
When I started my car, I was surprised to see my mother in the passenger seat. Then, I was not surprised. My parents loved taking drives. They would drive off alone exploring unfamiliar roads, looking at new vis- tas, talking with each other — they were best friends as well as spouses.
As we drove, I could see the sparkle in my mother’s eyes. There was so little I could do for her when she was alive, and I wanted so much to give her some pleasant moments. When I finally pulled back into my little duplex on Ke Iki Road, we looked at each other and I saw a single tear on her face, and I knew it was a tear of joy. I had seen too many of the other kind and I could tell
But I will see her again. She is always close by, watching after her little boy.
My frustration continued at a wonderful brainstorming convention last month. Again, great efforts were made to split up 150 attendees at dinners to ensure maximum social- izing, idea-sharing and perhaps even some problem-solving creativity. And then the live musicians began to play loudly, quashing any repartee. Attempts to chat suddenly required more airborne particles spewing forth than can be tolerated semi-post-pandemic. This wasn’t supposed to be a dinnertime concert, but it had the numbing and unintended effects of one.
So, 60 years later, I pulled out on Kamehameha High- way without a map or GPS,
The author learned that sometimes there’s great benefit in driving without a destination.
and my mother was ready. Mount Ka‘ala beckoned and the road was open. Travel- ing through Hale‘iwa, most shops were closed, little traf- fic, few people and the quiet
Kenneth Burtness is ad- junct faculty for Chami- nade’s master of counseling psychology department, and hosts the ThinkTechHawaii show, “Coronavirus and our Mental Health.”
Chasing The Light is pro- duced by Robin Stephens Rohr and Lynne Johnson.
— Liane Moriarty
with Kenneth Burtness
   Fill in the blank cells using numbers 1 to 9. Each number can appear only once in each row, column, and 3x3 block. Use logic and process of elimination to solve the puzzle. The difficulty level ranges from Bronze (easiest) to Silver to Gold (hardest). Answers are on page 11
RATING: BRONZE
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    As I’ve previously stated, nothing stimulates more parts of the brain than music. I am a lifetime music fanatic; it’s sim- ply the best. But at times, it needs to stay in the background, simply turned down. By the way, side note to headlining rock concert performers: We paid $150 per ticket so you “don’t stop believin’” but please don’t turn your mic toward the crowd at chorus time and encourage the world’s worst mass karaoke moment! We know you’ve aged, but c’mon, you sing it — please.
 Finally, I attended a well-done awards celebration break- fast, and after everyone played the awkward “and-what-do- you-do?” game in the buffet line, they returned to their tables only to hear the duo up front playing at decibel levels that precluded normal small-room conversation. Again, we’d been placed at tables to chat, learn, exchange business cards and ideas, but were stifled by a stultifying American Idol tryout unnecessarily taking place.
So, note to event organizers: Music is stimulating and vital. But at events designed for small group reverie, interaction among participants, and getting-to-know-you engagement, music should be dampened; it’s not a Woodstock/Coachella gala. Groups, soloists or DJs should know if they’ve been hired as background, not foreground or fairground, entertain- ment. It’s hard to listen when you can’t hear.
Think about it.
 john@thinkaboutithawaii.com














































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